Our Contradictions

1 10 2013

I am starting to find the world a much bigger contradiction that I originally thought and I honestly believe university is corrupting me.

I should explain.

Higher education is one of the most confusing chapters in my life so far that I have had to face with. As a freshman, I believed that by entering college I would gain the knowledge I needed to accomplish two ultimate goals: a) to live life fully and b) to change the world.

Unfortunately, I am no longer that naive freshman. I have come to realize that life is filled with contradictions and there is really no way to have your cake and eat it too.

You see, I am starting to get the notion that you can’t ‘live life to the fullest’ ( or YOLO* or whatever) and change the world at the same time. They are contradicting. I suppose if you set the parameters for the argument then you can say that in order to live your life to the fullest and change the world at the same time, you must set a goal for yourself. Then we come to the complicated idea of a ‘goal’.

In theory, having a goal is not all that complex a concept. You set a goal, take the necessary actions to achieve it, review it over time and set your goals again. For example, let’s say you wanted to step on the moon, you would study physics ( I’m assuming), get physically fit, apply to a space program so that you can be an astronaut and semi-gravity defying steps on the moon. Fairly simple concept.

However, the problem with people is that they have more than one goal and it gets even complicated when these goals contradict. What if I like to surf and I wanted to save the whales but the only way for me to ensure the whales safety in a specific bay, I would need to stop surfing. It may appear like a trivial matter but humans ( us) take our goals and passions seriously. We form emotional attachments to them and there lies the conflict. Our emotional attachments get in the way of us doing what we want in life. Things get more complicated when everyone in the world wants to take action to achieve their own goals.

Some may say these contradictions make life interesting. Sure, it does but it doesn’t mean life is any less confusing. Can we achieve everything we want without contradicting the different outcomes of the goals or the values we hold?

May be I’m thinking too much.

May be I’m being too ambitious.

I hope you find the conflicts in your life and effectively untangle them. Try. Be innovative. Be conscious and be aware.

* I really hate the term YOLO but I am putting it in for cultural reference

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Maturity

30 01 2011

Dear world,
So my old friend Derrick has returned to the blogging scene with his come back post on his plans for his life. To be perfectly honest I thought he dropped off the face of the earth. But there was always one thing that interested me about Derrick and it was not that I am a hormonal teen looking for a boyfriend!
Derrick always had a greater sense of maturity than anyone else I have ever met! No adult or teen or kid has been able to show to me that they were as mature as Derrick. Sure some have come close but never really on par. Sometimes I wonder if Derrick is just a class of his own.
I am getting a head of myself. The topic up for discussion this week is maturity. And I just had a friend who turned 18 and he is becoming a real prick. Whoever said that when you turn 18 you come more mature did not meet my friend (obviously)!
I am turning 18 this year and I really do not want to change. Sometimes I wonder if being mature means going back to being a kid. And now you all are wondering how this is so.
As cliche as it may seem, kids are more peaceful people (however, with constant violence in video games and in entertainment, this might no longer be the case in a few years).
Maturity, I believe, is defined by seeing the world much differently than how other people view the world. It is this ‘skill’ that makes mature people like Derrick, well, mature! Sure, I am waiting to obtain the privileges that come with turning 18 (who isn’t?) but I do not just want to drink my life away.
Kids do see things differently. Most of them are open to everything new to them, and their sense of adventure and curiosity is high. They constantly come out with new ideas(which we eventually steal and make our own).
People define maturity as understand big concepts like law or planning your future well, but those have a lot of grey areas! But how do we understand the grey areas when we were taught right from wrong. The more mature people come up with seeing everything in a different way and not to weight and balance the grey areas.
This year I want to explore all possibilities in everything. I want to be a kid. I want to be mature.





2010 Report/ Letter

31 12 2010

Everything has been firgured out, except how to live. Jean-Paul Sartre

 Dear world,

So this day has come. 31 December 2010. The last day of the year. Many Youtubers have done 2010 year reviews and I intend to do my own. Unfortunately, I don’t know if the entertainment level would be the same as some of the videos online.

Well, everyone knows what happened in 2010. Obama is rocking out the presidency. He even ended the war ( yeah, it was not that well publised). There is a new healthcare plan in America and the UK raised University fees. Singapore held the F1 again and the very very first Youth Olympic Games. Hmm, what else happened. Snow came to Europe and has packed up there. Wikileaks happened too; which is good for people who do end year reviews. Wikileaks was this years best scanddle. Last year I think it was Obama being president and Tiger Woods sex encounters. (Yeah the King of Pop was there too but the press had more fun with Woods). The I pad came out this year. You know, its just a giant sized itouch. The iPhone 4 was released too. The apple people are geniuses, (and not in terms of their technology). In terms of Youtubers. DeStorm as a new shoe modeled after him. Dave days is switching from paradies to his own stuff ( now not only is he cute, he is talented too).

But you would see this in all other year reviews.

Every year, I write a letter to myself and the very next year I read the letter and reflect. It is a good practise. I (finally) found last years letter and remember my deep and strong feelings towards getting into the school and course of my dreams. You may think now that this is some random rant but not entirely. Every year, around this time, I write two very personally letters, one to myself and another to my readers.

This year, thanks to everyone, I hit my 10,000 views. It was something to celebrate. I don’t see the numbers flying or sky rocketting any time soon but I am glad that I have a generally healthy flow of traffic to my blog. People ask me what do I write about and I tell them life. Sometimes it is personal. Sometimes I am trying to convince you of a cause and sometimes I am not too sure myself. That is life. Life is such a broad topic and I think that is why I love it so much. Like the quote above, no one really knows how to live. And I know many say ‘oh, you need a niche for your blog’. Screw you! Life is a niche. Everyone can relate to it. And when I blog, I figure out how people live and why people live them and try and understand you. And then try to tell you what I understand.

Next year, I will cramming (again) for exams. But I will blog when I have the chance and inspiration. But I plead all of you. Go out to the world and forget that its 2011 tomorrow. Enjoy countdown celebrations. Eat, drink ( don’t drink and drive). Tomorrow will come sooner than any of us will hope. And watch out. I might just be writing my 2011 year review WAY faster than any of us thinks.

All the best for the new year.

Love, Cheyenne.





Welcoming 2011 with a new habit.

28 12 2010

Adventure must start with running away from home. William Bolitho.

Dear World,

I know it is a coupld of days before the actual new year, but I thought I would promise my readers that I will commit to a new habit. What brought this on you might ask? Well, recently, I have been reading some articles and blogs about improving my writing. Many mention a form of a niche, something I concerntrate on. But, being me, I can’t really do that. I have too many opinions about way too many things. So, to try and keep my blog fresh, I will commit myself to find appropreate quotes to start each post.

I happen to like quotes. And may be it will help you too.

Let’s look at the one that starts this post. Adventure must start with running away from home.

I hope everyone gets that there is a potential hidden meaning under this quote. Home= security. ANYTHING that makes your feel secure. Adventure is all about taking risks; stepping out of your comfort zone.

There are a few reasons why this quote kind of starts off 2011, although not officially. Firstly, next year is my A level year and in terms of my theatre studies,  I might have to take big risks in order to be able to try and hit my best potential. Secondly, its a dare for you. In 2011, I would like everyone reading this to try and do something really really unusual for you. Be it bungee jumping or trying some new mexican cuisine. You don’t have to do it at the BEGINNING of the year. Take your time with this. If you know you can get impatient try a jig saw puzzle, 750 pieces.

Actually, everyday has potential for new experiences and new posibilities. You just need to run away from ‘home’ and take that risk.





The scary adult world awaits….

26 01 2010

Hey….fast and enhanced adult world.

I am Cheyenne. I am 16 and I am SCARED AS HELL.

There are many reasons to why I am scared as hell. Firstly, my school posting results are out in about 10.25 hours from now. That would be 8am on the 27th of January Singapore local time that the Ministry of Education releases the posting results. I DON’T KNOW IF I CAN GET INTO THE SCHOOL(S) OF MY CHOICE!!!!!!!!!!! Secondly, I have another fear concerning the school(s) of my choice. You see, I am eligible to enter a Junior College( JC) where it is compulsory for me to take Malay as a subject. If you haven’t been following my blog, or if I have yet to mention it then I will mention it now. I SUCK AT MY MOTHER TONGUE! Finally my mum told me I might not be able to study in an overseas university because we might not afford it.

NOW I AM SCARED AS HELL. I want to cry so much. Not that I hate Singapore Universities. I just really want to get out of this country. Plus there are universities that offer me better Drama or Marine Biology courses. I am currently looking at scholarships. I AM 16 AND I AM LOOKING FOR SCHOLARSHIPS!!!!!

There are other options. I am looking for a part time job. I am scared to death as it is and I don’t mind tutoring little kids to help fund my college courses. I don’t want to commit to a job just yet. I don’t know what my timetable is like until I enter a school (which I hope is soon).

I feel like a kid living in an adult world. My parents tell me don’t grow up too fast but the fact of the matter is that I have to. I can’t survive in this world without ‘ growing up fast’ . The harsh reality is hitting me hard, and I am not even facing the worst of it yet. I should have taken up a job.

I think when I am all settled, I’ll apply to a tuition center.

I am a kid living in an adult world. I wanted to grow up fast. I wanted to be free and I wanted to be extremely adult. Now I wish time would stop. Just for me. I don’t want to grow up any more.

I am scared for what the world will bring to me.

Sometimes I wish I didn’t turn 16…..

Lots of luck,

Cheyenne





We are just Ordinary People

1 01 2010

Before I begin, let me just ask you all something. Did 2009 seem to past by fast? Through out 2009 I felt the earth spinning faster. Everything just seemed to go really fast and there was no time to stop.

A couple of days ago I bought the soundtrack of FAME with my Christmas money. I saved the soundtrack on my laptop and into my Ipod nano. There is one song that I can’t help but constantly listen to. Ordinary people by Asher Book.

We’re just ordinary people
We don’t know which way to go
’cause we’re ordinary people
Maybe we should take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we’ll take it slow (Take it slow oh oh ohh)
This time we’ll take it slow

Above is the lyrics from the chorus. It is actually a love song. But the chorus is amasing.We are Ordinary people. We need to take it slow. Think about 2009 for a little bit please. Did it not go by fast for you? Did you rush through anything?WHY? We are people. Not robots. There is nothing to rush. We humans rush like crazy to save time and with all the saved up time we have, we just waste it on TV or something really lame. We need to slow down.

To all the working folk, calm down. Settle deals slowly this year. A rushed brain lowers productivity. Do things slowly and well and be done with it. Not do it fast and then it ends up to be crappy.

To students, including those in Polys, Universities, Pre-U or other standards, in exams take your time. Don’t rush. You miss stuff out when you rush through everything then you don’t do well. What is the point?

To everyone, let 2010 be meaningful. Let it have a slow pace so that you get the job done and can smell the wonderful roses at the same time. We have to enjoy 2010 and yet we do not understand why.

I dare each and every person here to slow down for 2010. Take time to breathe. You have to let your brain think for a little while and slow down. You are an Ordinary person. NOT A SUPER COMPUTER

We are Ordinary People. To my fellow Ordinary People, ‘this time we will take it slow’

With my regards

Cheyenne Phillips





My guide: Surviving Singapore’s Schools

25 08 2009

I was kind of inspired by Ned’s declassified school survival guide. But that is mainly for american kids. It  can be applied to Singapore students but we have a different way of doing things. So I thought I help the future and current graduating school students out and make this guide. I am reviewing the structure of my blog and thinking of doing a survival guide on life in general. I am still thinking about it but my O levels are in the way so I have to rethink a lot of things.

So we just had our English oral examinations. EVERYONE LISTEN TO THESE TIPS.

  • Tip #1: Chill. Even if it involves throwing ice down your blouse. I am not just talking about to keep cool because of the warm weather. Keep your nerves down.
  • Tip #2: Orals are easy. So don’t worry and don’t study. When you are nearing your orals, you come up with strange creative ways to ‘ study’ oral. There is a structure and things you should take note off but nothing you can’t see and think of with your brain. Be creative when you begin.
  • Tip #3: Examiners truely hate it when you completely treat this like an examination. Most have a nice smile on their faces and encourage you to do your best.
  • Tip #4: During conversation throw in a joke or two but don’t over do it. Make sure it is related the to topic and if your joke fails just smile.
  • Tip #5: Orals are like going to an interview. Make sure your hair is neat. Your shoes, cleans. Your blouse pressed, your teeth clean. Don’t eat garlic or onions. Have a tictac od drink something fruity before entering the examination all.
  • Tip #6: Have fun. If you have fun the examiner will too. It is an added bonus and you score higher.

All the best!

Cheyenne