Words

People use a lot of words. To me, words are just what they are. Words. Words without actions are just words. People tell each other they love you or that they care. Sorry is another popular one.

They are all words. Words mean nothing to me. It’s the actions. I love actions people show others. I find them more real. I really do. I don’t know how to explain it. People use words all the time. People say stuff they dont mean or cause friendships to die because of the words they say. I believe in actions. Cause actions speak louder than words.

I try and watch the words I use. I never want to make people assume stuff I dont mean.

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

I understand that it might be alittle too late for this movie preview since the curious case of benjamin button came out a year ago however, I was unable to watch it as it was rated and I was underage. This year the movie came out on CD and DVD and my dad bought it. For me, the movie has ended and I watched all 80 years of Ben’s life.

This has been a very anticipated movie for me. I have been jumping up and down and I was so close to being so desperate to watch this movie, I would have killed. NAH! kidding.

But I seriously wanted to watch the movie.

And I am very happy that I did.

I swear, I was crying for the last hour of the film. And the movie was 2 hours long. I cried for half a movie. And I will admit it. It just made you appreciate the possibilities. It opened more eyes. Yes, this movie opened more eyes than 100 movies put together. It opened an eye for a possible story of several lives of men. It opened up an eye to what true love and sacrifice meant. It opened an eye to show many of us how much a father loves his daughter and how he would go through to provide for her. Ben did so many things I would have liked to do like travel the world, sail and meet interesting and new people. The other characters, like Ben’s crew mate who gave Ben all his pay to give to his wife, also showed and taught great lessons. Like the sailor who continuously thought about his family. Like the sailor who left to save his life. Like the twins, how they fight on land and be at peace on sea and then one died. It opened up a world of history too, a part of history I never thought I would have the chance to see.

I believe the most important lesson taught was from Mr. Cake the clock man. The blind man who built a clock that ran backward. If time ran back ward, his son would be home. If time ran back ward, no one would be at war.

For me, if time ran backward, I would have never make the mistakes. I would have never had made my choices. I never would have learnt the lessons people taught me and I would not have understand myself better.

It doesn’t matter what the past was. Or even if the clock runs backwards. Or if you age backwards. Time runs forward. I suggest we run along with it.

Where do I go?

I would love to thank Fran to introducing me to this song. However, your interpretation of it might be very different from mine. Lets look at the lyrics.

Twenty thousand miles from the place I call home

And twenty some odd years since the day I was born

And I’m searching, I’m still searching for answers
( Always have been searching for answers, since the day I was born. I never knew what was truely the right think to do. Like one of those situations where you killed a guy out of self defence)

People have often told me to chose a different road

That this one can get ugly, twisting turns that just grow old

But I’m walking, I don’t care if I’m walking alone
(I have considered myself adventurous and brave. But sadly, the few I can’t stand up to are the ones who care about me. I can’t stand up for who I am).

And I’m, screaming into the dark

Searching for an answer, where do I go from here?
( Screaming into the dark: hopeless. No one will find me. No one will truely help me. There is not much hope for me left. Try searching for something in a dark room. Hopeless right?)

I, I don’t know where I’m headed

Or if this is just a big mistake
( I have had my share of mistakes but every action I seem to take is a mistake. Everything I do is a mistake. I have no direction right now. I am lost. I made my mistake…I just don’t know what it is)
Something’s telling me that falling down

Is a chance that I’ll just have to take
( failing? hurting the majority? Is it really an option for me? Am I capable of doing so?)

I get on the bus and put down my bags

And take a final glance at the only home I’ve known

At the only home I’ve ever known
( When there was a situation I felt at home, now I am walking away from it. I felt wanted and cared for and understood. Very understood. Am I letting that all go for a reason? Yes. Am I letting it go for a good enough reason?…. I am unsure of that answer.)

And I’m screaming into the dark

Searching for an answer, where do I go from here?
(Was I pressured? Did the darkness pressure me? Did I get too scared? Was screaming into the dark and yelling at it and fighting it back getting hopless for me? Was it getting tiring for me?)

All of my life, I’ve been so comfortable

But I always knew, that there’d come a day

When I’d have to get out, get out
( 3 people as of now have told me that I am easily pressured. Is this the incident I break out and stand up for myself? Live for my happiness and not the happiness of everyone else?)

I’m sreaming into the dark, searching for an answer

Where do I go from here?
( Is there really hope? should I give up? Should I carry on?)

And I’m standing still but I can’t catch my breath

Already running as fast as I can but going nowhere

Where do I go from here?
(Is this failing me? Is this me falling? Is this me trying to fight back? Do I have the energy to fight back? Can I fight back? Do I want my happiness?)

That was a bit of soul searching too. But that is what the song meant to me.

friends…

I figured I must be going something terribly wrong because I seem to be losing my friends.  One decision made and told made everyone around me seem different. My friends don’t like my decision and I don’t want to fight them. We are friends. We don’t fight. We support and care of each other. So what am I doing so wrong that I hurt everyone around me?

Strangely enough I feel likt Troy Bolton. I feel like my friends are tearing me down and not backing me up. I’ll quote my cousin when I asked her to stop. She said it’s my life. Yes, it is. I know every one is looking out for me but that is what they tell me. I can’t help but wonder you know….

Well, whatever doesnt kill me makes me stronger.

my recipe

You Are Made Of Love, Fascination, and Inspiration 3 parts LovYou Are Made Of Love, Fascination, and Inspiration 3 parts Love 2 parts Fascination 1 part Inspiration And a Splash of Imagination Limit yourself to one serving. This cocktail is strong! e 2 parts Fascination 1 part Inspiration And a Splash of Imagination Limit yourself to one serving. This cocktail is strong!

my soul…

Your Soul is Fiery

You are very passionate and quite temperamental. While you can be moody, you always crave comfort. You are a very grounded, responsible, and realistic person. People may not want to hear the truth from you, but they’re going to get it. You see yourself with pretty objective eyes. How you view yourself is almost exactly how other people view you. Your near future is a lot like the present, and as far as you’re concerned, that’s a very good thing. For you, love is all about caring and comfort. You couldn’t fall in love with someone you didn’t trust.

Your name’s power???

Your Name’s Power is Creativity

Your name’s power is that it helps you be creative. Your name conveys both purity and skill. People who meet you can’t help but think you are charming. You try to live your life with people you trust, surrounded by nature.

My fav colour

Your Favorite Color Says You’re Gifted Intuitive — Seeking — Creative Kind — Self-Sacrificing — Growth Oriented Strong — Very Wise — Rare

What kind of happy are you?

I am excited

.You are vibrant and lively. You bring passion to everything that you do.
You are very animated and energetic. People find you dazzling and charming.

Beyond being happy, you are optimistic and enthusiastic.
There’s so much life to live, and you’re eager to experience so much!

What I need to be happy?

I need friends

You are a friendly, social person. You seek out connections and relationships.
Being close to others is very important to you, and you don’t like discord.

You feel great when you’re cooperating and working with others. You enjoy belonging to a group.
Nothing makes you feel worse that feeling alone or alienated. You want to be liked by those around you.